Gaurav's Blog

This can usually be found on Twitter.

Back in March 2000, I got a crush on a girl. I was nuts about this particular girl for pretty much exactly four weeks at the end of which I asked her out (sort of), got rejected by her (sort of) and then flew off to Pune for a holiday. I can't remember - I know I was in touch with her by e-mail, and have a vague recollection of still having a bit of a crush on her, but I really don't know. I guess in some ways this was my first really big crush, so.

(As an aside, my next really big crush occured in March 2003. A pattern? No idea, but I am waiting impatiently for March 2006, just in case :D - unless of course I meet the girl of my dreams - henceforth refered to as GoD - before that, in which case, of course, it does not matter)

Okay, back to the story. As it goes, I'm not sure exactly what happened between us then and how I felt about it, etc. But I do know I met the girl again in July/August 2000 (I think?) and my feelings flared up for one brief romantesplosion before she shot me down, only a few short weeks later.

Now, what's important isn't the crush story (if you're curious: we re-establish contact, I'm still sorta resentful about the last "episode", contact sorta breaks by itself; repeat this cycle about two or three times until July 2004, when we finally "got it right". Now I count this girl as being one of my closest friends. Ain't life grand?), no, what's really important is the strange state of mind I was in in between the two infatuation incidents.

Firstly, it was a nice positive frame of mind, on the whole. I mean, come on - I had just finished 10th Std ('O' level equiv), hadn't done too badly, and I had a whole buncha months all to myself and nothing to worry about. I literally have no idea what I did in those three months, at all at all (oh, I think I was on the net a lot, because a bumped into a random person who would end up becoming another one of my best friends, but other than that ... this might've also been the time of the famous Vaidya family trip to Kabini River Lodge, but I could be screwing the dates up ...)

Anyways, to return to the point: those three-odd months were spent in a haze of dreammland - or, even better, dreamtime - when reality, improbability and life mixed freely and effortlessly together. I was just sitting back and reading an R. K. Narayan book, and I was suddenly reminded of that time. It's all walking on the edge still, hence the "premature" warning in the title, but if I let myself go just a little bit, imagine myself post-exam post-ISM post-project stress, I think maybe, just maybe, I'm going back there again. Wow. Sounds like fun :).

This post was posted by Unknown at 5:38 am