This can usually be found on Twitter.
I should probably give up all pretense of organisation at this stage. I'm tired, dead, bored, and life is winding me out. It's the weekend, yay, etc. - but it looks like it's going to be a boring one, which is a depressing, depressing thought to have. I might stay up watching movies, and then take the cab back ... god, I shouldn't, but it's tempting. I might go watch a movie just to have something to do this weekend, or some other such equally pathetic thing. Life! etc.
Names. I like how ancient cults are supposed to have had a concept of a True Name - a name which belongs to you, which performs the functions that a real name is supposed to perform - to identify (it is I, Gaurav), to establish relationships (son of Girish, of the family Vaidya), to specify localities (born somewhere in the west of Maharashtra, where the names "Gaurav" and "Vaidya" might be found close together) and definition (from which you can tell I am probably Indian, and perhaps even human, unless there were animals which called their sons, and said, from this day forth you shall be Gaurav son of Girish of the family Vaidya, just like we do). But of course, any name does that - the True Name is true because it is more. We are all unique (although it must be remembered that we are not uniquely unique; in fact, we are boringly unique, each unique is his or her own mundane way), and the True Name is the identifier of that which is absolutely unique about us.
Uniqueness is nice. I once had a great fear that I was so very similar to somebody else I knew that it might be hard to tell us apart, and it worried me for days. The sense of relief I experienced when I took a step back and realised that however similar some superficialities might be, and however identical some of the deeper pillars, there were enough fundamental differences that the similarity might never be noticed, and I immediately felt much better.
Uniqueness defines us. In love, in life, in struggle, in despair, sometimes it's all we've got to fall back on, to show for the twenty-odd years that we've seen fit to inhabit this world for. When we fall in love, we wonder whether so-and-so will like us - us, singular, the one, the only, etc. When we struggle through life, we wonder what we - us, singular - could ever have done to deserve this (this we say when we are happy too, which makes us wonder yet again at the nuances of English, but never mind that for the moment).
When all we've got is us, we wonder what it is that we have, exactly.
Our True Name holds that secret.
Our True Name tells us why we act the way we do, why we love who we do, where we go, what we eat, who we are, what we like (The Beatles?), dislike (Ren and Stimpy) and what we'd rather wish never happened (v4).
In later posts: how I might be *finally* leaving lab soon, asking girls out, and other suchlike matters. This may take a while. I am in desperate need of R and R.
This post was posted by Unknown at 10:07 pm
"A beach house," he said, "doesn't even have to be on the beach. Though the best ones are. We all like to congregate," he went on, "at boundary conditions". "Really?" said Arthur. "Where land meets water. Where earth meets air. Where body meets mind. Where space meets time. We like to be on one side, and look at the other."