Gaurav's Blog

This can usually be found on Twitter.

Had a respectably decent Saturday - woke up on time (but went back to sleep and work up late), watched a movie, went to work, went out for dinner, sat around listening to good music for ages.

This is a bad time to bring this up, but just to let y'all (i.e. Rivka) know that as of half a week ago, I'm officially copping out of NaNo this year. There's too much to do, too little time, etc. etc. I might work on this story after the end of the month, I really might, it really is a lot of fun, but then there'll be a lot to do anywheres, anytimes. Maybe after I join the ranks of the unemployed sometime February next year.

Well, okay, I probably won't; but unlike last year, I'm probably not going to just forget the whole thing or anything.

Just saw the most amazingly beautiful thing on BBC World. The reporter was delivering his usual summarise-everything-up final speech, which he was doing from the ground floor of this amazing combination church-and-mall in America (which is an entirely different, but equally interesting story, but I digress), and he's looking up at the camera, which is zooming in on him from the first floor. It's a very nice setup, and looks great, and as he starts talking (into his wireless mike), the camera zooms slowly outwards to show him amongst the masses of people.

Which is when you notice the girl walking just beside and in front of him. She keeps looking back at this strange man talking in a well modulated British accent while staring into the distance, waving his hands and talking extremely enthusiastically - with himself. She kept looking to trying and find the camera, and I think she did finally spot it just as the BBC logo obscured her face. And all this while, obviously, the reporter is completing his report, the cameraman keeps filming, and the world keep spinning.

For me, noticing the people at the edges of the spotlights is exactly what makes life worth living, because in the simplest of views, there are the people in the spotlight, and there's the rest of us; but unlike the rest of us, the people in the edges aren't satisfied with being in the dark. Sometimes they make it, sometimes they just stay here with the rest of us, but sometimes, they slip into the slipstream, and turn up in the corners of the spotlight. Just for a moment or two. Fifteen seconds of fame.

Then again, we're all of us almost always in somebody's spotlights anyway, and sometimes we're just unknown, and sometimes, we're there, and we're not. At the edges of the spotlight. The world entire, but only just barely?, if you see what I'm trying to get at?

Yeah, whatever. I'm dead sleepy, which is why my thoughts are all coming out all backwards. Layer Cake's a pretty decent looking movie, although I got a whole bunch from the rental today. Now it's a nice, hot bath and a cool, lonely night for me, I guess. Also need my fan to get fixing. Sigh, sigh.

In other news ... well, no, the (minor, I know) depression isn't lifting, but it's becoming a little more easier to hold it all together, somehow, I think. You start off depressed, but not really realising you are?, you think maybe life's just a little worse than usual?, but once you realise that yes, you're actually actively being pulled down, it's easier to try and push your way up and out. Maybe. Maybe. Yes.

This post was posted by Unknown at 2:34 am